Kau and aku gak beda banyak dalam perkara relationship. Halangan terbesar, khususnya kita laki-laki, masalah ego/pride/arrogance, especially waktu kita salah. Kita gak mo ngaku. But the true test of being a real gentleman kalo kita bisa humble ourselves, admit we're wrong and say I'm sorry. Bro, luangkan waktu lebih dlm doa dan menyembah, minta Tuhan tunjukkan waktu yg tepat tuk bertemu dgn Livia dan mohon Tuhan lembutkan hati bukan hanya hati Livia and hati kau juga.
Kalian berdua terluka sama dalamnya, walau kita sebagai laki-laki mungkin menyangkal, tapi bayangkan peranko/stamp dan amplop/envelope yg sudah dilekatkan begitu rupa, waktu dikoyakkan, keduanya terkoyak sama parahnya. So, it's very simple, bro. Don't make it more complicated than it already is. Kamu berdua emang marah, jengkel, emosi, dll. Tapi di atas segalanya, kalian berdua saling cinta. Kalau tidak, maka gak akan marah atau jengkel. Tapi cinta yg begitu besar di antara kalian yg bikin marah dan jengkel begitu besar pula.
The challenge is, look beyond the negative and hang on the positive that really matter. Tak ada pernikahan yg takkan diuji dgn isu perselingkuhan. Dan pernikahan yg realistis bukanlah pernikahan yg tidak pernah ada selingkuh tetapi pernikahan yg melewati lembah perselingkuhan dan menjadi pernikahan yg lebih kokoh. Aku blom menikah tapi bisa berkata demikian krn pengalaman intim dgn Tuhan. Hubungan realitis dgn Tuhan bukanlah hubungan tanpa dosa setelah keputusan utk bertobat. Tapi hubungan intim yg realistis dgn Tuhan itu diwarnai dgn banyak perbantahan dan kemurtadan yg tak berbeda dgn perselingkuhan antara suami dan istri. Tapi setiap kali kita murtad dan kembali, satu hal terjadi, hubungan intim dgn Tuhan itu semakin kuat. Kita semakin menyadari betapa cintanya Tuhan dgn kita, dan tak ada suatu kemurtadan yg bisa buat Tuhan tidak cinta dgn kita. So same thing with marriage.
Set your eyes on what really matter. Everything else is just a distraction from devil to destroy and prevent the perfect plan and will of God to happen in your blessed and happy marriage life. And that's what happened in the first place, aku berani yakin selingkuh ini besar kemungkinannya berawal dari kau kehilangan arah dan tujuan in what REALLY matters in LIFE & MARRIAGE that led you to selingkuh. Dan iblis tak perlu waktu panjang. Kasus kau tak banyak beda dgn Daud-Betsyeba. Hanya perkara DETIK, bukan jam/hari/bulan, buat kita jatuh dlm dosa bentuk apapun.
Expect miracle and you will receive it, also don't forget to ask for guidance from the Lord and comfort while enduring this turbulent period in your NORMAL, REALISTIC MARRIAGE.
Last thing, don't feel that you fail. Selingkuh itu normal dan wajar tuk terjadi, tak perlu digembar-gemborkan, NEEDLESS TO OVERRATE. Semakin kita anggap besar selingkuh itu, semakin rumit penyelesaiannya. Namun tidak berarti, it's okay to selingkuh. Don't get me wrong, IT'S NOT OKAY but selingkuh does not make you less than a man or a bad husband. It does not define anything about you at all. Just look at it as 'THINGS HAPPEN'. You are a righteous man of God. You are a precious child of God. Nothing of your action will make God value you less or look down on you. You are FOREVER righteous, precious and priceless but NOT by any attribute of yours but by Christ's love and sacrifice on the cross. So keep that in your heart. You'll be fine and I'm looking forward to hear your happy resolution story. Take care and keep in touch.
Kalian berdua terluka sama dalamnya, walau kita sebagai laki-laki mungkin menyangkal, tapi bayangkan peranko/stamp dan amplop/envelope yg sudah dilekatkan begitu rupa, waktu dikoyakkan, keduanya terkoyak sama parahnya. So, it's very simple, bro. Don't make it more complicated than it already is. Kamu berdua emang marah, jengkel, emosi, dll. Tapi di atas segalanya, kalian berdua saling cinta. Kalau tidak, maka gak akan marah atau jengkel. Tapi cinta yg begitu besar di antara kalian yg bikin marah dan jengkel begitu besar pula.
The challenge is, look beyond the negative and hang on the positive that really matter. Tak ada pernikahan yg takkan diuji dgn isu perselingkuhan. Dan pernikahan yg realistis bukanlah pernikahan yg tidak pernah ada selingkuh tetapi pernikahan yg melewati lembah perselingkuhan dan menjadi pernikahan yg lebih kokoh. Aku blom menikah tapi bisa berkata demikian krn pengalaman intim dgn Tuhan. Hubungan realitis dgn Tuhan bukanlah hubungan tanpa dosa setelah keputusan utk bertobat. Tapi hubungan intim yg realistis dgn Tuhan itu diwarnai dgn banyak perbantahan dan kemurtadan yg tak berbeda dgn perselingkuhan antara suami dan istri. Tapi setiap kali kita murtad dan kembali, satu hal terjadi, hubungan intim dgn Tuhan itu semakin kuat. Kita semakin menyadari betapa cintanya Tuhan dgn kita, dan tak ada suatu kemurtadan yg bisa buat Tuhan tidak cinta dgn kita. So same thing with marriage.
Set your eyes on what really matter. Everything else is just a distraction from devil to destroy and prevent the perfect plan and will of God to happen in your blessed and happy marriage life. And that's what happened in the first place, aku berani yakin selingkuh ini besar kemungkinannya berawal dari kau kehilangan arah dan tujuan in what REALLY matters in LIFE & MARRIAGE that led you to selingkuh. Dan iblis tak perlu waktu panjang. Kasus kau tak banyak beda dgn Daud-Betsyeba. Hanya perkara DETIK, bukan jam/hari/bulan, buat kita jatuh dlm dosa bentuk apapun.
Expect miracle and you will receive it, also don't forget to ask for guidance from the Lord and comfort while enduring this turbulent period in your NORMAL, REALISTIC MARRIAGE.
Last thing, don't feel that you fail. Selingkuh itu normal dan wajar tuk terjadi, tak perlu digembar-gemborkan, NEEDLESS TO OVERRATE. Semakin kita anggap besar selingkuh itu, semakin rumit penyelesaiannya. Namun tidak berarti, it's okay to selingkuh. Don't get me wrong, IT'S NOT OKAY but selingkuh does not make you less than a man or a bad husband. It does not define anything about you at all. Just look at it as 'THINGS HAPPEN'. You are a righteous man of God. You are a precious child of God. Nothing of your action will make God value you less or look down on you. You are FOREVER righteous, precious and priceless but NOT by any attribute of yours but by Christ's love and sacrifice on the cross. So keep that in your heart. You'll be fine and I'm looking forward to hear your happy resolution story. Take care and keep in touch.
Your LOVING brother, Zech